Menu
 Zpět

Avoiding Labels

What exactly does it mean to label a child?

Labels, be they positive or negative, can do more harm than good to a child’s self-esteem and emotional development. They’re easy to say without thinking or in the heat of the moment, and many adults think them harmless. However, labels such as “you’re naughty”, “he is too shy”, “she’s bossy”, “she is a leader” can greatly influence how a child views him or herself; by labeling the child instead of his or her actions, we unwittingly create a permanent trait of who the child thinks he or she is. This is when labels become a dangerous mistake.

What's harmful about labeling? 

  • Labels box a child in - Whenever we label someone, even if we don’t say it out loud, in some ways, we are setting them up for more of that behavior. Think of us as adults and how we approach stereotypes. A child who is labeled “naughty” will be seen as such even when his or her motives are kind and innocent. Labelling prevents us from seeing the person or the child for who they truly are.

  • Labels influence expectations - In extreme cases, labels – even positive ones - help to form unrealistic expectations of a child, which can create perfectionist tendencies or anxiety. They definitely change our expectations and in turn create a self-fulfilling prophecy of the child’s behavior.

  • Labels can be wrong - Have you observed a child greeting teachers, other adults or even perfect strangers with smiles and waves on one day, and then hides completely the next? Humans have many complex emotions, behaviors, personalities and preferences, and the same goes for a young child. It’s impossible to summarize them in a simple label!

Montessori principles and how to use them at home

Suggestions to prevent labeling

Let’s start with baby steps. First, try to catch yourself when you use labels. Such awareness can help prompt you to hold back the next time you begin to label a child out loud, and will eventually help you to gather your thoughts and clarity when labels come to mind. Second, try to see a child as a person with behavior, be it positive or negative, and separate your views of a child from his or her behavior. This will help you connect and empathize with a child even when he or she misbehaves.

What we can do is to practice labeling a child’s behavior instead of them. For example, instead of saying, “you are shy”, try statements such as “it takes you a while to be comfortable with people” or “you are talkative with people you know well”. By taking steps to be aware of your choice of words, choosing the right words and approach, and labelling and addressing a child’s behavior instead of them, you help set them up for success in life rather than hindering them from reaching their fullest potential.

by Caryn Khoo

Want to learn more? Read our next article:

ABSORBENT MIND – A KEY PRINCIPLE IN MONTESSORI

Další články

Tidy Up! An Activity Your Toddler Will Love

Looking at our Toddler classrooms, even a casual observer will notice that half of the children’s time seems to be spent cleaning. They’re busy sweeping, wiping, mopping, scrubbing and brushing; even almost antiquated activities, such as washing laundry by hand or polishing wood and metal objects, have their place. 

Read more

Forest Exploration with Toddlers

At IMSP we are fortunate enough to have access to a forest right on our doorstep. This offers invaluable opportunities for our toddlers to explore the natural world with the support of their guides. Interaction with the natural environment provides mental and physical health benefits for children and adults alike and allows children to be inspired by the world around them, away from their usual home or classroom environments.

Read more

Communicating with the Toddler Child

As teachers, we are often asked what special tips or tricks we use to get children to cooperate. Most often parents ask questions like “How can I get my child more interested in dressing and eating by themselves?”or “How can we make the mornings run more smoothly?” It can feel challenging when our patience is tested, but we must remember that children are learning to develop their own will and sense of obedience which is a natural process lasting until around six years of age.

Read more

Reading from a Young Age Matters

A picture is the first content of a book that a child can „read“. Thanks to pictures, a child can understand a story without knowing how to read, interpreting the main figures/animals, the environment, and the situations from the visuals. From illustrated facial expressions and body language the child can also tell emotions.  Enjoying a good book raises a love and passion that is necessary for prereading skills.  

Read more

The toddler who won’t

We all know the scene: a frustrated parent, a child that refuses to listen and do as they’re told, the fight that no‑one wins.

Read more
15.04.2023
Join us for an Interactive Open House Register for
Baby & Me
Register for
Toddler & Me
Virtual tour